Crystal Linnen

Some days I pick up this book during a free moment, pick a page and start reading.  Some days, I pick it up and move it from my office desk to my nightstand.  Some days I seek out this book because there’s something going on in my world that calls for a reminder of who I am and where I fit in to this life.

Soul Propriertorship was given to me to read by a good friend.  I was going through some particularly rough stuff at the time and was already on the way to realizing on my own that my coping skills needed work.  I can get through anything – if there’s nothing I know for sure about myself, I know that – but the way in which I’ve gotten through hasn’t always felt right.  And this time more than any other time in my life, I was overwhelmed with issues that were slowly but surely overcoming me.

The friend that gave me the book actually had no idea the turmoil I was dealing with – we were friendly acquaintances at best.  But he recognized somehow that I was struggling and gifted me with Soul Proprietorship.  It didn’t fix me, it didn’t solve all my problems, it didn’t give me pat answers to tough questions.

Instead, I got something so much more valuable to me than all of those things.  I got a physical manifestation of courage.  The more I read (and re-read), the more I thought about what I was reading and how Al’s teachings correspond with who I am at the core of my being.  I realized that I was holding in my hands what had been eluding me for  so long.  Courage!  I have been afraid for as long as I can remember.  So long that it doesn’t even occur to me most of the time that I operate from and make decisions based on fear.  So long that in the midst of all my personal turmoil, I was at a complete and utter loss as to where to turn, how to deal and how to manage this mess I felt I had created.

Soul Proprietorship spoke to me in a language I could understand.  Al’s style is sincere, heartfelt, plain spoken and truly logical.  I decided to trust in his voice rather than the one in my head and it’s serving me well.  What I learned more than anythng is that it’s not about fixing.  It’s about being able to be present in your life and making the choice to deal with what comes your way.  Good, bad or indifferent.  Ask yourself out loud what is the worst possible thing that could happen if you made choices that completely correspond with who you are on the inside?  The real you.  The you that’s maybe gotten lost.  I discovered that the worst possible thing isn’t nearly as scary or daunting as I thought it was.

Someone handed me courage in the fall of 2009.  I am grateful.  I am paying it forward.

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